I know what you're thinking: "So, what has the Great Camileon been up to?" Okay, maybe not those exact words, but close enough, right? Anyways. Honestly, I haven't really been up to a whole lot, lately. My trip to Boston was about the most exciting thing that has happened, or that will happen, this summer. Well, other things have happened.. Exciting things.. Some very wonderful things. But, no big trips or crazy summer-vacation-y things.
I, now, have a boyfriend. His name is William and he is absolutely amazing. And, no, I'm not trying to make you guys jealous nor am I mentioning him in some kind of "premature-5th-grade-boyfriend" kind of way. I'm not going to bore you with how wonderful he is(which, by the way, he is very wonderful) nor what we've been up to. Because, 1. that's pretty personal, and 2. I know you guys don't really care(and, if you do, then you should ask me privately about it.. just sayin').
There is a very good point in me mentioning my newly found boyfriend, though. Please, bare with me on how cheesy some of this may sound.. I promise, you'll understand where I'm coming from. Anyways. Ever since he and I have started dating(only a week ago.. I know, such a short time), I've been happy. Like, really happy. Happier than I've been in a long while. And, it made me realize a few things. First of all, I've been through a lot in my lifetime, especially in the past year. And, for a while, I was honestly really depressed. I felt alone and scared. I hated my life. I hated myself. Mostly, because I blamed myself for things that happened. Then, I finally realized that it wasn't my fault. It really wasn't anyone's fault. It was just.. Well, it was just life. And things happen in life: good things, bad things, confusing things. Just things. And there's nothing we can really do about it after all is said and done. So, I moved on.. Or, really, I tried to move on. And, I'm still trying. But, its getting easier. Don't worry.
Secondly, even though I am moving on and getting "better," so to speak, I was still pretty depressed and still felt alone. Of course, until I met William. Cheesy? Yes. Do I care? No. Anyways. He just kind of made me feel.. Important. Visible. Human. And, at the time, I felt he was the only one who actually thought of me as human. He listened to me and made me laugh and just made me happy. I mean, he still does, but I realized that he's not the only one that can do that. I realized that I did have lots of good people in my life; I was just blind to it before. I was so wrapped up in the bad things that have happened to me that I ended up ignoring all the good in my life that happened everyday.
And, lastly, after coming to the realization of all of that, I now know how blessed I am. I've got two loving parents that are happily married. They've provided me with a roof over my head, food on my plate, and clothes on my back. I have a wonderful support group that is my family, which includes two older sisters, aunts, uncles, a butt load of cousins, and plus all of my "extended" family members. I have a group of amazing friends that I know will always be there for me. They may not be the exact same friends that I've always had, but they're all wonderful just the same. And, now, of course, I have an incredible boyfriend who is also like my best friend.
I know, I know. Getting a boyfriend isn't supposed to be "life changing," and I'm not saying it is. It just so happens that it took a certain someone named William to make me realize all of this. Well, not to mention my loving mother, who I've had some very in-depth conversations with lately. And, of course, also everyone else in my life, because they all have their unique effect on me. So, I really have everyone in my life to thank.. Sooo..
Thanks, you guys! :)
-Camile <3
